Parents can reach for this book when their teen is navigating the painful, confusing shifts that happen in intense friendships, especially when romance and identity are involved. The story follows inseparable best friends Naomi and Ely, whose bond is protected by a 'No Kiss List' of people off-limits to them both. Their world shatters when Ely, who is gay, kisses Naomi's boyfriend. This act of betrayal forces them to confront jealousy, codependency, and the pain of unrequited love. Appropriate for older teens, the book realistically portrays the messy, emotional fallout of a friendship breakup with the same gravity as a romantic one. Through alternating perspectives filled with wit and heartache, it explores themes of forgiveness, identity, and the different forms that love can take. It’s a great choice for teens learning that sometimes the most important relationships need to be redefined in order to survive.
Characters attend parties where there is underage drinking.
Sad ThemesModerate
Deals with the intense pain of a friendship breakup and unrequited love.
Sensitive Topics
The core topic is identity, particularly LGBTQ+ identity. Ely being gay is a central, accepted fact of his character, and the approach is direct and secular. The story handles unrequited love and the pain of friendship breakups directly and with significant emotional weight. The resolution is not a simple return to the way things were, but a realistic and hopeful evolution of their relationship.
Ideal Reader
A teen, 14-17, who is experiencing a major friendship breakup or shift. This is perfect for a reader grappling with jealousy, codependency, or the pain of loving a friend who can't reciprocate romantically. It's also an excellent read for anyone seeking realistic, character-driven stories with prominent LGBTQ+ representation.
Parent Prep
The book includes mature themes for older teens, including frank discussions of sex, some strong language, and scenes with underage drinking at parties. Parents should know it's not a light romance but a realistic look at messy relationships. The alternating perspectives are key to understanding the full conflict. A parent hears their teen talking about a major fight with a best friend, saying things like, "I feel so betrayed," or, "I don't know if we can ever be friends again." It's also relevant if a teen is struggling with a complicated friendship involving unrequited feelings.
Age Experience
A younger teen (14-15) will likely focus on the dramatic betrayal and the emotional rollercoaster of the fight. An older teen (16-18) is more likely to appreciate the nuances of codependency, the importance of individual growth, and the complex exploration of platonic versus romantic love.
What Makes It Special
This book's unique power lies in its dual-perspective narrative that treats a platonic friendship breakup with the same depth and seriousness as a romantic one. The witty, sharp dialogue and authentic New York City setting make it a standout, defining a specific era of contemporary YA fiction.
Read plot summary
Naomi and Ely are lifelong best friends and neighbors in a Manhattan apartment building. Naomi is hopelessly in love with Ely, who is gay. To preserve their intensely close, codependent bond, they created a "No Kiss List" of people neither is allowed to kiss. This system implodes when Ely kisses Naomi's boyfriend, Bruce the Second. The betrayal causes a massive rift, forcing them to navigate life, identity, and other relationships separately for the first time. Told in alternating perspectives, the story follows their painful separation and eventual journey back to a new, healthier version of their friendship.
This overview was generated by AI based on the book's content and reviews, and may not capture every nuance.
Discussion Prompts
1
Naomi and Ely’s 'No Kiss List' was meant to protect their friendship, but it was at the center of their fight. Was the list a good idea? What are other 'rules' friends sometimes make, and do they work?
2
The story is told from both Naomi's and Ely's perspectives. Did you find yourself siding with one character more than the other? How did seeing both points of view change your understanding of the conflict?
3
Naomi struggles because she is in love with Ely, who is gay. How does the book explore different kinds of love (romantic, platonic, familial)? Do you think Naomi and Ely are 'soul mates' even if they can't be a romantic couple?
4
By the end, Naomi and Ely have to find a new way to be friends. How has their relationship changed? Do you think it's stronger or weaker than it was at the beginning?
